Saturday, October 29, 2016

God Gave This Heart Purpose!












Yesterday, October 28, 2016 at 17:00....I did something hugely out of my comfort zone because God told me to! And when daddy tells you to do something- you do it!

I went to WSPA News Channel 7's news station...and "Shared My Story."

Last month, I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed- mindlessly- and saw something eye catching. An event was suggested to me...because you know...Facebook "knows me" and it was actually awesome. WSPA partnered with the American Heart Association and the Go Red For Women group to bring awareness to the major killers of women- Stroke and Heart Disease. The event in summary was for women to share their story- their experience with heart disease and /or stroke and how this has affected them.

My heart started besting fast and hard in my chest when I saw this event. I believe it was the Holy Spirit jumping up and down in one of the chambers of my heart- beating on the walls- telling me to go and to do this. I knew instantly I needed to share the testimony God gave me. But I wanted to remain quiet and secretive about this until it was over. Not just because I am shy-though nobody believes I am. I wanted to keep this between God and myself because this was not about me. It never has been. This is about God and His glory. His miracle. This story is God's story. So, I vowed to God I would do it- no matter how nervous it made me because I know when He calls me to go. Sometimes a mission field is right in your back yard.

Some time went by and it was just on my paper calendar- covered up by a sticky-note so nobody could see my plans for this Friday evening. Y'all, I did not even inform my husband or family. This was truly mine and God's mission together. I didn't want to hear people telling ME praises about ME, giving ME kind words about MY opportunity. I wanted to be completely quiet, humble, and focus on God here. I knew I could tell others about this once God got me past my fears so that He may be given more glory.

I am an anxious person who plans out every little detail and thinks of every possible scenario. So one Saturday afternoon- I was relaxing and watching "Selena"....I love that movie...I still cry every time I watch it...loved her music! Anyway- I was watching this movie and me and my dog, Blondie were snuggling. I started allowing my mind to drift away from the movie and onto my fear of attention and focus on me- camera shy- and I started doubting what God told me. I knew in my spirit God had called me to go to this event coming up and share His testimony in my life and on my heart- but the human me was allowing satan power to creep into my mind and give me doubts and fears. It was when I started becoming truly overwhelmed by my fears that Blondie got restless and stepped on the TV remote changing the TV from my DVR to live TV. Slightly frustrated I went to get the remote to flip back to the movie I've seen too many times...when suddenly, a commercial about this "Casting Call" to "Share Your Story" came on loud and clear. Once again- Holy Spirit was inside my heart jumping around and I knew God was reminding me that He is Lord and He has called me to do something to share His love, miracles, power, and glory with others. I love how sometimes God is so silent and subtle with His answers and other times He literally throws the answer in your face.

So, at this point I called my daddy and told him and told my mama and husband only. I was seeking prayers for them to calm my nerves and just discuss how this is about God- not me and so God's will shall be done. This is my greatest passion- glorifying God while educating others on good heart health and learning more and more myself about the heart and other's stories with heart disease/defects and stroke. From this moment on- I felt God encouraging me towards His purpose.

I remained the event a secret still, only telling my best friend and co-worker that I would be leaving work Friday at 3'oclock in order to be somewhere. Cryptic but she gets me.

I got home from work on Friday- changed into a red dress as red was the obvious attire for my interview. As I steamed the dress in preparation the night before, something caught my eye. I'd recently FINALLY gotten into the spare bedroom closet to pull out my fall wreathe. And in this closet in the way of my wreathe is a clear bag preserving my childhood treasures. One of these treasures in my red heart shaped pillow from MUSC Children's Hospital that I received when I was there most recently in 1995. On this pillow is a diagram ( to help a child understand their complications and how they were resolved). Once again....Holy Spirit started banging on my heart walls and doing His excited dance. I knew this was something I should take with me to this interview. I am thankful to have medical knowledge from my career in medicine (influenced by my defects) and my passions about cardio-thoracic surgery and am able to understand the full anatomy of the heart and vessels. I am able to explain my complications as a surgeon would- as would anybody else in my position. Spending your life in hospitals. Some more than I! I knew God brought it to my attention and so- I took it with me on Friday for my interview.

Friday- Eric drove me to Spartanburg to the WSPA news 7 station. And goodness y'all if we didn't run into HORRIBLE traffic!! We left the house early as to arrive 15 minutes early. I am truly a planner. But- I didn't plan for this much traffic. Plus it is already almost an hour away!
As we sat in traffic, I spoke to God. I was like You know what God? I am not even gonna worry about this traffic. If this were about me- I'd be having a panic attack trying to be OCD, high strung, planning, organized Emily. But You know what, God? This is YOUR interview. NOT mine. Let this be about You and what You want to say. Let this be about Your miracle, and Your will. And God- Your will is going to be what's gonna be anyway so hey! Let's do this traffic if that is how You want it. Yup. Literally. I told God all this. He is my daddy. He rocks at listening and understanding.

Get there-cool, calm, collected. We were greeted SO sweetly by every single member of WSPA and AHA Upstate. Eric came up with me. We get in the interview room- I wasn't sure what to expect. But let me tell y'all how real my camera fear is- I stopped drinking water when I got home from work because I was afraid I'd have to excuse myself to the ladie's room during the interview! This made my mouth dry! Hahaha! I am not lying when I say I plan everything. Same way when I run a race...I don't drink much before hand...I get anxious at the start line. But goodness do I drink during that race! Anyway----back to the point----we get into the room and sure enough...CAMERA. LIGHTS. yes...that was plural. I LOVE sharing my story- I do it rather daily and constantly- I love dancing in crowds, motivating people during activities, and I love encouraging others in hard or uncomfortable situations. You can put me on a stage and ask me to lead thousands in prayer or greet people. But put me in front of a camera and my anxiety shoots to an all time high. SO I smiled, took a deep breath, and moved forward with God's purpose. Remembering....God is on display- NOT me. This is God's moment - NOT mine.

The interview began- I shared my same story I've shared here, and on my old blog countless times. I was cotton mouthed, and I was shaky- but I delivered God's message. I spoke about my passions. I performed God's purpose for my life. and I pray God was glorified. I pray the Spirit of God was present to more than just myself in that room. I pray that I was an encouragement to anybody with struggles, heart disease, and major burdens in their lives.

I truly am thankful for my heart defects because they give God glory. How cool is it that God makes our weaknesses our strongest attributes? David and Goliath y'all...David and Goliath.

Anyway- I wanted to finally make this public in prayer that it helps others, and gives my mighty God glory! Thank y'all for the constant love and support. And remember- live healthy lifestyles- care for that body which is a temple we glorify God with! Love y'all!!




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