I had imagined like most people do around here that I would have graduated college one weekend, then been married by the next at 22 years old. But that was not God's design for my life. So- not wanting to just date any random guy, or to settle, or try to make things work with a "nice enough" guy- I vowed to stay single and I vowed to only date my husband. That sounds impossible to a lot of people. But when you work with God and vow to Him and pray for truly His will- accepting it-even if it means no husband- you know and believe that no matter what the outcome you will only be eternally happy. You have to first have an amazing relationship with God. Make God your everything and then always keep Him in that position. Many friends and family members of mine can tell you that I was lonely and pining for my husband. However, guys would ask me out and I would turn them down. Some would say to me that I should at least give them a try. But why waste anybody's time? I knew they were not mine.
It was hard for people to understand my prayer and how God had answered it. I literally prayed this prayer, "God, please build a brick wall around me so that no man would see me or desire me unless he were my husband- if a husband is your will for me. Allow that brick wall to also aide as my blinders so that I too will not see or desire a man who is not my husband you may have designed for me. Allow that brick wall to tumble down the moment my husband has arrived. God, you say ask and it will be given, you say You will give us the desires of our hearts. I desire nothing more in this life than to marry a wonderful Godly, handsome, loving man. But more than this desire, I desire Your will. I will honor You and praise You, God- even if it means I am single all of my life." Then, I'd made a very specific, non-settling list of all the qualities I desired in my future husband and I prayed over those. I would not under any circumstance take anything less because these were the things that really mattered to me in a Godly spouse and I knew that if God was to design a husband for me, then that man would possess every quality.
Then, one Sunday at good ole' Mt. Airy, in a pew with friend, Robbie Funk, while singing along with the choir- my eyes spotted a tall, handsome, smiling, dimpled, broad shouldered, bright, silver-speckled hair man walking up the aisle coming right up beside me. Y'all----I am not kidding a bit when I say----the brick wall tumbled in that very moment. My heart was pounding and soaring and exploding in my chest. Love at first sight? Heck no. I don't believe in that. God's opening of my eyes---HECK YES! This man was mine! And I had no clue who he was!
And in only 2 weeks post this sighting and revelation did we then become inseparable. God had answered my prayers. But, this non-settling list I made of the qualities of my husband? The one that could not possibly be topped? God somehow created more on that list. He did not take away- God added to that list!! God gave me more in Eric than I even knew I desired! I don't even know how that is possible! But- nothing is impossible when you give it to God!
Eric is my best friend. My BEST friend!! People would always tell me after he and I were engaged and after hearing, seeing, witnessing my gushing love and giddiness for him- that these feelings were cute but would only last a little while. "Life changes and so does your marriage." And while they said I would always love Eric, they said these giddy loving feelings would eventually simmer down. I cannot tell you how MAD those people in my life made me when they would say that. As offensive as this may be- and I do not mean it offensively- those are the people who quit trying in their own marriages. Now I fully understand there are some marriages where one spouse is giving 110% and the other spouse 0% and I feel truly sorry for those people who are fighting to no avail for their marriages. That is a different scenario. But for those who say things like this and think it is normal and simply just stop trying...those who may not necessarily have a bad marriage but have a less than fun, hot, spicy, exciting, loving, adventurous marriage- do not EVER tell me that my marriage will be like that. I prayed with all my might for God's will and He gave it. And I will never ever EVER take that HUGE blessing for granted! No marriage is perfect but I swear----our marriage is probably the closest thing to perfect this earth can see. And I do not mean that haughtily or arrogantly. I credit it all to God. It is not because we are two perfect people, on the contrary, my friends, it is because we are two very, very, imperfect people who trust God to lead our marriage. God is the heat and spice and romance of our love. We choose to forgive. We choose not to have petty arguments. We choose to respect. We choose to honor. We choose to fight for each other. We choose to put ourselves last. We choose to have insight into the other's feelings and desires. We choose to listen. We choose to apologize immediately. We choose to make time for one another. We choose to serve one another. We choose to play together and be each other's best friend and companion. We choose to be a team. We choose our marriage and we choose to love God more than one another. Love is an emotion but it also and most importantly a choice. And that is romantic. To choose everything else for your spouse before yourself. To choose to have as strong a marriage as possible.
There will still be skeptical, bitter, and sour people who love to stomp on other people's happiness who will say things like...well it has only been 2 years and you have no children... or you have not faced hard things together yet.,.. call me in 10 years...etc. etc. To those people I would say again and again- We are not you. We are us. We have faced some things that nobody else could possibly understand and they have only made us stronger together, We are aware life will bring challenges and again- we choose to be teammates through the challenges of life. Any marriage that glorifies God will harshly be attacked by the stupid and weak little devil in hell below. So trust us- we know life will have challenges- we expect them- again- we choose and refuse to be torn apart by life but rather choose to allow God to make us an indestructible force of strength and love and happiness.
I can honestly say the honeymoon is still going strong and only gets more and more fun! I don't understand how it is possible but I truly love Eric more and more with every single passing day. Not only does my love grow but my respect, appreciation, and desire for him grows, too! He is a blessing beyond belief. I will never take him for granted and I will be on fire for his love every moment of my life.
We are so excited as our marriage is growing into a family of 3 in about one more month! Watching Eric discover his fatherhood role and the joy it brings him just constantly explodes this joy in my heart. We have in preparation to become parents vowed to remember our love for God first, then one another, then our Ellie, then ourselves. I am so thankful to see the physical creation of our love and literally hold a tangible expression of our love in our arms!
So- readers, friends, family----
* Thank you for those of you who have invested in our love and relationship.
* Do not EVER tell me that I am in a "Honeymoon Phase".....I am in a better than honeymoon life love thanks to my amazing God and allowing His will and not mine.
*Wives should spoil husbands just as much if not more as they expect their husbands to spoil them, It is a beautiful circle of love and it doesn't have to be fancy or complicated.
* And do remember- to fight for your marriage and your love. Even if it means just you going in alone on the fight for a while. It is so worth it. Let God lead your love story. I did!
And to my darling Eric- thank you for your loyalty to God, to your wife, and to your family. Thank you for being a goof ball and dancing with me and opening yourself up to me even when it makes you shy. Thank you for your many sacrifices, hard work, and help. You do it all so effortlessly simply because you just love me- its like a no brainer to you. You make your service seem like a joy instead of a chore. I am so lucky and blessed. I will never take for granted your desire to love and serve me. I pray I display the same service and spoiling to you. I am in love with you emotionally, physically, and mentally. You enlighten all my senses and give me the biggest goofiest smile. I could never be fully me without you. I have never felt complete until I met you. You are my complete opposite and it works so perfectly. You are a beautiful person. I love your heart. I love YOU! Happy 2 year anniversary and 4 years of being in love! Here's to growing love for many many many God willing years ahead!! Muah!!
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